‘Should’ is the Root of All Pain

How often do you catch yourself thinking, “I should be further ahead,” “I should have done better,” or “They should understand me”?

These “shoulds” become invisible chains, trapping you in frustration, guilt, and regret. They pull you out of the present moment and place you in an endless cycle of unmet expectations.

All the things we thought should happen but didn’t — that’s a measurement of pain we impose on ourselves. But here’s the truth: Life isn’t about meeting some imaginary standard. It’s about living authentically, embracing who you are, and accepting where you are right now.

Lean into what is rather than what should be, and watch your mindset transform. ✨

But why do we think in terms of ‘should’?

• Is it societal expectations?
• Past experiences?
• Family pressures?

Our ‘shoulds’ often come from external standards we’ve internalized without questioning. Challenge these assumptions by asking:

• “Who decided this should be this way?”
• “Is this truly aligned with my values?”

Replace your “shoulds” with empowering choices:

• “I would” — encourages possibility. “I would explore this if I’m ready.”
• “I could” — opens up potential. “I could try this and see what happens.”
• “I must” — fuels commitment. “I must do this because it aligns with my values.”

These shifts turn pressure into possibility, and regret into responsibility. 🌟